One evening a son was talking to his father about current events.  He asked what he thought about the shootings at schools, the computer age, and just things in general. The dad replied, "Well, let me  think  a minute...

I was born before television, penicillin, polio shots, frozen  foods, Xerox, contact lenses, Frisbees and the pill.  There were no radar, credit cards, laser beams or ball-point pens.  Man had not invented pantyhose, dishwashers, clothes dryers, (clothes  were hung out to dry in the fresh air) electric blankets, air conditioners, and he hadn't walked on the moon.

Your Mom and I got married first -- and then lived together. Every family had a father and a mother, and every boy over 14 had a rifle that his dad taught him how to use and respect. And they went hunting  and fishing together.

Until I was 25, I called every man older than I, 'Sir' -- and  after I turned 25, I still called policemen and every man with a title, 'Sir.'  Sundays were set aside for going to church as a family, helping those in need, and visiting with family or neighbors. 
(I miss that most).

We were before computer-dating, dual careers, daycare centers, and group therapy. Our lives were governed by the Ten Commandments, good judgment, and common sense.

We were taught to know the difference between right and wrong and  to stand up and take responsibility for our actions. Serving your country was a privilege; living here was a bigger privilege. We thought fast food was what people ate during Lent.

Having a meaningful relationship meant getting along with your   cousins.  Draft dodgers were people who closed their front doors when the evening breeze started. Time-sharing meant time the family spent together  in the evenings and weekends -- not purchasing condominiums.  We never heard of FM radios, tape decks, CDs, electric typewriters, yogurt, or guys wearing earrings. We listened to the Big Bands, Jack Benny, and the President's speeches on our radio. And I don't ever remember
any  kid blowing his brains out listening to Tommy Dorsey.

If you saw anything with 'Made in Japan' on it, it was junk.  The  term "making out" referred to how you did on your school exam.  Pizza  Hut, McDonald's, and instant coffee were unheard of.  We had 5 & 10-cent stores where you could actually buy things for 5 and 10 cents.  Ice cream cones, phone calls, rides on a streetcar, and a Pepsi were  all a nickel. And if you didn't want to splurge, you could spend your nickel on enough stamps to mail 1 letter and 2 postcards. You could buy a new Chevy Coupe for $600, but who could afford  one?  Too bad, because gas was 11 cents a gallon. In my day, 'grass' was mowed, 'coke' was a cold drink, 'pot' was something your mother cooked in,  and 'rock music' was your grandmother's lullaby. 'Aids' were helpers  in  the Principal's office, 'chip' meant a piece of wood, 'hardware' was found in a hardware store, and 'software' wasn't even a word. And we were the last generation to actually believe that a lady needed a husband  to have a baby. No wonder people call us "old and confused" and say there  is  a generation gap......and I am only 51 years old.

By this time, the kid was laughing so hard I was afraid he was going to suffer serious internal damage, so I didn't tell him the part about how I had to have permission to leave the table. But here are some other things I would have told him about my childhood if I figured his system could have handled it: 

Some parents NEVER owned their own house, wore Levis, set foot on a golf course. Mom tried to make a pizza, I bit into it, I burned the roof of my mouth and the cheese slid off, swung down, plastered itself against my chin and burned that, too. It's still the best pizza I ever had. 

We didn't have a car until I was 15. Before that, the only car in our family was my grandfather's Ford. He called it a "machine." I never had a telephone in my room. The only phone in the house was in the living room. Before you could dial, you had to listen and make sure some people you didn't know weren't already using the line (called a Party Line). 

Pizzas were not delivered to our home. But milk was. All newspapers were delivered by boys and all boys delivered newspapers. I delivered a newspaper, six days a week. It cost 7 cents a paper, of which I got to keep 2 cents. I had to get up at 4:00 am every morning. On Saturday, I had to collect the 42 cents from my customers. My favorite customers were the ones who gave me 50 cents and told me to keep the change. My least favorite customers were the ones who seemed to never be home on collection day. 

Movie stars kissed with their mouths shut. At least, they did in the movies.  I don't know what they did in French movies. French movies were dirty and we weren't allowed to see them. 

If you grew up in a generation before there was fast food, you may want to share some of these memories with the young ones. Just don't blame me if they bust a gut laughing. Growing up isn't what it used to be, is it?